Learning.. always learning

The past 2 weeks I have not done much in the crafty realm. I like to blame the weather that had my hands hurting to the point that I could not do much (they are like weather veins) But in my never ending quest to keep busy I dove into learning more about PTSD. I had seen a Dr Oz show that got me started thinking about it  few week before. On the show The guest was talking about how any traumatic event can cause this  kind of reaction from the body/brain.
Note: before I go on I want to make clear that I think most times PTSD that non military people deal with is less but that does not mean that it is not there. Our brave men and women who have served our country are dealing with the worst kind because they had to do things they would never do in "normal" life and they saw way more then that. This post in NO way is trying to make PTSD smaller then it is, I am trying to talk about a scale of mild to totally disabling. Each person's experiences are different and so is the aftermath.
As I thought more about that and reactions/feelings I saw that both Hubby and I have been dealing with issues that fall into that spectrum. I am blessed to be a part of a group on Facebook for PTSD support/learning. The lady who facilitates it has a wonderful understanding and a beautiful way of putting things into words to really uplifted and support. Reading other's challenges, has given me a clearer understanding and has helped me see how it affects those in my life.
Over the past five years both my husband and I went from working full time to be home full-time (still hoping I can get back to work). This transition has not been easy especially for him as he feels responsible for the family support. This transition has caused many PTSD symptoms and has taught us coping skills. overall I think we are handling our situation very well. But I wish I had learned more sooner.
As I look back over my life I can see several traumatic incidents, and after each incident I saw a change in myself. At the time I dealt with it, which was the best thing to do (sometimes it took many years to deal with but it has been done) but had I known more about PTSD even in my teens it would have better equipped me to deal with things in a timely fashion.
The biggest reason I wish I had learned more sooner is that it might have assisted with my ex-husband. He didn't like to think of it as PTSD so I never dove into it. He preferred survivor syndrome or something of that nature and I did do some looking into that but that was not as helpful to me, it might have been more helpful for him... I have no regrets as I did what I could but sometimes looking back you see what more you might have done.

Some things that PTSD can cause:
Feeling unloveable, worthless, not a "man" (breadwinner)
Acting out verbally, physically, and sexually (one of the biggest issues is cheating)
Depression, trouble sleeping, nightmares from hell, fatigue
Those with PTSD are often argumentative and seem to start something from nothing, but what their brains say they believe.. ie "you always treat me like a child" they feel like you are waiting on them hand and foot like you would a sick kid, so you must think they are like a kid. but in reality it is because they need X, Y and Z to stay calm so you just got those items for them without being asked. (btw this is not a real example)

Some tips for all of us caregivers, family or friends who want to stay in their lives:
Don't say like "it is all in your head", "I don't see anything wrong so you must be fine" or "you are not the person you used to be" anything along those lines. those with PTSD want to be the person they were before and most are working every day to be that person. This put down can set them back months
Don't let them get away with acting badly, but learn to remind without anger (this is something I am still learning..) and respond without anger when lashed out at ("inferred" or real)
Help where ever you can, even if that means going in the next room for a while so that calming down can happen faster.
Find ways to help them release the anger they feel at not being able to do the things they used to do, or for feeling that they are worthless/ unlovable
Find ways to release your own pain, you cannot be a caregiver (in any way not just PTSD) for long if you cannot have you time, and things that help you unwind. (My crafts are part of that for me, also computer games)

My 2 cents :)